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.Thursday, December 10, 2009 ' 5:35 AM

Looks like its hard to find someone to go macau/HK with me during dec now. But that does not stop me from going still !

i'll be heading there alone during 21st dec to maybe 24th dec. A short get away trip alone might be interesting! hehhh.

: D

.Sunday, November 22, 2009 ' 8:56 PM

I've been home since the last 48 or more hours and never left home a single step. even my meals were delievered. and i'm skipping my dinner today, because i've run out of cash and i'm too sick to go out to buy. pop some pills and cough mixture and i'll sleep out that hunger later on.

i've been coughing for years and this coughing thingy has been with me since a few years back and i got totally no clue how did it started. i hope its some sort of lung cancer and hopefully it's at its final stage and spare me from more torture. everytime i cough, my chest hurts, it feels like something stucks between the air pipes and i'll have a hard time to breathe. thus, there's countless of times where i'll be coughing multiple times struggling for air.

ohhh... if only somebody out there can feel what i've been going thru. wow.

have been drifting in and out of sleep waking up only at times when its lunch or dinner. hate myself for always being sick. stayed out of contact with the world during my hibernation period and there's this feeling of like being in a tranquilized place.

having been asleep for quite a long time, i had an amazing amount of dreams and i could clearly remember some or most of them. actually, not really dreams but some sort of a flashback, from childhood to adult to some deja vu scene which i do not know how to explain. from songs, to movies i've seen years back, to hobbies and many more. frightening indeed.

often people usually says or maybe old folks stories that i've heard before that a dying person actually have flashbacks of his life to remind him what have he done before he passes away.

amazing huh. but sadly i'm too tired to carry on...

gtg bed. nights.

Because tonight

Will be the night
..seasons are changing
..and waves are crushing
..and stars are falling all for us
..days grow longer and nights grow shorter
..i can show you i'll be the one.

That i will

fall for you

i dont love you - matt powney

over again.

KPOS !!!!! .